braxton hicks

I've been having braxton-hicks contractions more and more, starting this past Wednesday. They come and go and are at their worst when I am doing too much, i.e. standing on my feet alot, etc... this week has been harder than most... I have been tired, and swollen. my socks leave marks on my ankles.

I have the feeling that my boss is a bit more distant that before.. since I told her about working from home... they could always so no....

the babies are so active now.. they move ALOT.. the heartburn has been a killer, mainly the reflux, but I dont know what else to do about it.

D goes out of town for 2.5 days tomorrow... ewwww, that means I have to do everything!!! Im gonna be so tired!

Struggling

So, Im struggling… a lot, with my weight and appearance.. I just saw pics of myself and I look like the Goodyear blimp. I feel so ugly. I kinda want to cry.

I did it

I talked to my boss this morning and told her about the doctor's request of working at home at 28 weeks. She seemed to take it ok... she made notes and I probably sounded like an idiot, at one point I started to well up... but I explained everything to her... it seems like it might be dooable. She will let me know when she figures something out.

I was scared talking to her, but I also was sick to my stomach all morning, so I called D and asked him if I should just go ahead and talk to her... get it out of the way...

I have an appointment with Dr Kouzami tomorrow am... Dr weitz is out of the office... I am worried about his take on my weight gain, but should get to see the boy tomorrow.

I have really been sturggling with bad heartburn and/or acid reflux... esp at night. D had a good idea to walk for 10-15 minutes after dinner... maybe that will help. I am starting to feel very pregnant and heavy... sometimes it is a bit overwhelming. I am not sure how we are going to afford these babies...

Grumpy day

So it has been a grumpy day for me.
First, today is 20 weeks (YEAH!!!) but that means no more sex after this... no actual penetration, I guess...
We played two mornings ago and afterwards, I had a couple of contractions, so we both kinda freaked. This morning, after my mornign pee... we were trying to play, but D could not finish... he kept saying that he did not know what was wrong with him, but I finally asked him if he was scared and he said yes... he did not want to hurt me or the babies....so that was sweet, but both of us seem a bit frustrated.
We went out at lunch to Ulta and I really wanted some new makeup, but I felt guilty. D got me a massage gift certificate (that i have to pay for when I get the massage) and chocolate and cards.. the girls got me (and the babies) two of the cutest outfits. But all I got D was two cards... I felt bad. Then yesterday we tested at McCormick and made $90.. and he was like, we can go spend it... made me feel bad. So the stuff I wanted at Ulta, I put back.
Kinda perturbed me. Then he got a call from his dad about the basement project and we both started realizing that we are not going to be able to afford to do the basement... we are both perturbed about that...
and D is having a crappy day at work, so he is in a major funk, and when he is, I am.

Also, not to complain, but I am feeling kinda crappy lately. I feel really big, and my belly feels heavy ALREADY... and I feel like I have gained everywhere.... like I am a big blob.
Tomorrow we will have to go to Home Depot and price fixtures and stuff for the possible basement bathroom... then to Babys R Us to put things on the registry. I say this but noone has mentioned a shower and I feel funny about kinda expecting one... no friends or family close.
I feel alone in this excitement, and now I am in the money funk.... the "oh shit, how are we gonna do this?" funk.

How are we gonna pay for these babies?

Big news

We had our big ultrasound on Feb 5 and now know that we will be expecting Jake and Annabelle Shepherd....

a boy and a girl! This is Annabelle, we could not get a good one of Jake.

This is me at 18 weeks....

Today is Valentine's Day and I got the good stuff... a really nice mushy card and chocolate. I also got a gift cert from Dan for an hour long prenatal massage... made the appointment for April 12. I can't wait. I should be huge by then, so that will be so relaxing!

Jake has been up in my ribs ALOT already... I cant believe how big my belly is and how high it is already.. I am going to be so big. Today I feel really big... not just fat, but pregnant BIG... everytime I look in the mirror I feel like I look like a whale.
Dan keeps telling me that I look great, but I did get a comment today about how I am showing mostly in my belly, but also in my face.. NICE!!!!
Last night was a rough one... I had what felt like reflux all night and it made me miserable. Then around 3 I had the most insane charley horse in my right calf... OMG.. it was so painful. D woke up in a stupor and rubbed it out for me.
I am still sore today from it.

The girls are doing good.. Kelsey seems to be trying to be civil to us a bit more, but is still so mean to Allison. I wish they would get along, but what can I expect... they are sisters.

I think Saturday we are gonna go to Babies R Us and put more things on the registry. We bought more winter clothes and D's dad called to talk a bit about the basement remodel this weekend. I really hope we can start working on that.

I need to pray more that God will provide daycare and money for these babies.... that is my biggest concern right now, but I know He will work it out.. I just have to believe that.